Every day is a lifetime.

There is no life and death in a regular sense. Only falling asleep and being awake. Every sleep is death and every wake is birth. Every sleep is a bardo after life and every wake is a birth after death. The actual death is just a larger doorstep that you cross and your own essence decides if you have to repeat or go forward to a step higher set of circumstances you have to learn about. If you repeat you will stay here and re-experience very similar things all over again for about 80-90 years. Count that in minutes because that’s how old we are when we think of every day as a lifetime. It’s like a deja vu when you open your eyes each morning. Repeat, repeat, repeat. Only our body that we occupy is slightly older every day. Then at the larger doorstep we will fall asleep again and will go back to the same circle all over again, or bump a notch up on the spiral. It’s not just a coincidence it’s called samsara. The never ending circle. 

That’s a mistake to think of every day like your last. Like you have to rush for fun and fulfillment. When we understand that every single day is a lifetime; a new birth, and we know that death is just sleep, we would go through every sleeping hour and dream with an awareness to heal, we would be more ready for our new birth in the morning. When we sleep we enter a bardo state, just like when we enter a bardo when we die. 

We shouldn’t be fun and fulfillment seekers. While we are so weak in understanding how to live a true life that we really desire, we should be observers to observe our own self and the living beings around us. We should not think that we are independent of hungry ghosts and demon spirits everywhere around us. They are trying with all their power with no ending in sight to deceive us in believing that we should live an anxious, slave life with fake fun, chasing after youth and beauty, believing that grumpiness will liberate us. They won’t stop whispering into your ear what you want, what you like and desire. Even if you never wanted, liked or desired those things they want you to do and feel. 

More you are asleep-awake during a day, more you are asleep in every lifetime. This is just a temporary return spot when we wake up in the morning, this bardo where we come back after every night to re-experience again while we still use this body. At death we won’t occupy this body again, but so many people get stuck in this bardo. Because they think that sleep is not death and they don’t understand that there is nothing else but going in and out of this bardo every day and night. When you understand that every day is a lifetime you will know that there is no rush necessary, that rest and meditation is very important and nothing will run away from you, nor fun, nor work, nor success, nor fulfillment, nothing will run away from you, and nothing you have to chase after. Everything that today consists is how you spend a lifetime. And you have given so many lifetimes. No rush necessary. No desire necessary. No fear necessary. No habits necessary. No fights necessary. Only to recognize the magic around you and inside you while you observe everything and only immerse yourself into things that are pure and things that lift up your purest essence. Only then you will raise your awareness to a higher self and into deeper understanding. And that is the true journey to real healing and immeasurably blessed possibilities. 


Today isn’t the last day of your life. 

Don’t rush. 

No need to have fun.

No need to work.

No need to fulfillment.

Today is your lifetime. 

Nothing to worry about. 

Just face your purest essence.

Fall asleep at the end. 

Tomorrow is a new beginning.


High desert teaching, July 7, 2018

For women

It's not about being young, it's not about being a woman, it's not about being beautiful, it's not about being accepted, it's not about having success, it's not about being accomplished. Those things are not eternal. These things all just come and go. They are just pebbles mixed in with the wind rolling around. I can not hold onto them. They were important to recognize them at one point as a mirror, but they are not where I should stop, since they are empty, depthless reflections. So what is the next step? It's about being happy, being healthy, being giving, being loving. It's about looking at the world and myself with acceptance.
It's not about accepting myself as a woman. That's just a step. It goes deeper. I have to let go of that accomplishment and be something more. The next step is to be a goddess that is like Mother Earth. It's not about accepting myself as a woman as I look. Now it has to go deeper. I have to be a womb that transcends and gives. To be able to do that I have to give up being a woman as I was. That accomplishment was finished. Now I have to be earth, I have to be a lake, I have to be the moon, I have to be a mountain, I have to be a tree with all my woman energy. That is transcending.
The next step is to radiate myself as a woman from the depths. It's nothing to do with beauty and it's nothing to do with looks. It's more like a deep feeling that blows constantly like the wind coming down the moonlit mountain. That's the next step.

Desert teaching #1: 3/12/2017 

About too much bravery

I was brave like no one. I taught myself so many lessons and accepted the most ridiculous challenges. I fought in so many wars and accomplished so many losses and victories. I was able to find recognition from others and was able to enter my inner cities as a hero.
Now it is a different time. The old ways are over. The swords have to be put down. Even if it seems like surrendering. It is not. It is transcending war. It is transcending rush, chaos and madness into calmness, meditation and stillness. The war is still there but the swords are laying dropped on the ground and I am only a viewer. I don't fight anymore. I recognized that it's all the same. Now the outcome is all the same. Fighting the war was important more than anything before. But that was just a step. That wasn't the final destiny. Even though I got so good at it being a brave hero, I am not a warrior anymore. I am a traveler, a viewer and a wanderer. I don't carry swords anymore. I don't jump into battles anymore. I see them but they don't excite me anymore. 
The next step is acceptance. Not the things that I fought against. Fighting was important. But not anymore. Now it's time for accepting what comes without fear. And trusting that I will be ok no matter what.

Desert teaching #2: 3/12/2017 

Small steps of lifetimes

There is always a next level. There is no such thing as final accomplishment. And I am not talking about your professional development. I am talking about your spiritual development, the finding of who you are. The you who you are. There is no arriving on that one. One day you look in the mirror and if you are honest enough, you would say, "who you are? I thought I knew you, but you seem fake." And it's hard to say, because so much work goes into finding yourself. So many sacrifices and so many compromises. It's hard to admit that you are on the search again, it's hard to admit that you are on the crossroad again.
Finding your next level step doesn't slow down as you get older. In a sense it actually speeds up because you are closer to the door of death. Your time is actually shrinking on this learning planet.
So don't stop. The minute you say and celebrate that I am this and I am that; your next level brewing right in front of you. Even if you close your eyes and pretend that you accomplished to lose a hundred pounds, even if you are accomplished to feel beautiful, even if you just accomplished to forgive your abuser, even if you accomplished to love yourself. That is not the end. That is not your final destination. That is not who you are. There is a next level. There comes the next step. Be honest to yourself to see it. It is so hard to admit that your crutches that you found with hard work, the very things you did for yourself and others for years and years, all the compromises you built up to make it better: they are crumbling. The building is collapsing because you don't need those anymore for your next step. You can't build on the old foundations. It is about transcending the old to find the new. Transcending because the building blocks are there and because at the end you won't need any. But in the sense there is no "at the end" at all.
This is the shaping of you. It's necessary to crumble down. It's painful to let go all that kept you alive and you worked so hard for, and let go of the very things that "made" you. But that's how transcending works. And that's how you make one more step ahead.

Desert teaching #3: 3/12/2017 

Be your Leader

Life is so short and there should be time for building and laughing and loving and creating and traveling and seeing. And still, everyone is absorbed in this rush.
It's all for self.
What is for others?
Do we really need success in life and art and doing and making? What if the success exists just for itself.
I guess the only things worth working for are that which helps people forget the illusion that they are robots. To stop them and show them a mirror and to say: this is you, you are a child, and you are safe. Don't worry.
All our thoughts and dreams create us. If we get stuck on something in our brain, our lives get stuck on something too.
We shouldn't follow our thoughts, we should lead them.
e shouldn't follow our feelings, we should lead them as well.

Forest teaching #1: 3/18/2017 

About teachers

Everyone is a spiritual teacher. The only difference is your choice on how much time you will spend on receiving and sharing the teachings. The deeper you go about receiving them, the deeper your teaching is going to be. The more you open up to receive, the more you pay attention to messages from higher realms: the more you will share with the world. That's how everyone grows to slowly get closer to enlightenment.
What you teach you can not learn from books. There is no formula about what a teacher is supposed to say or do. There is no formula of how a teacher is supposed to act. There is no mold that a teacher is supposed to fill. Every one of us is an individual with different strengths and weaknesses. Because you have a weakness or a doubt, it does not mean that you are unfit to teach. Your teaching is not your creation, it is just your ability to listen and to share what you have been gifted with.

City teaching #1: 04/14/2017 

About growing plants indoor and outdoor

Leave nature alone. You are not going to create anything in nature. You can nurture the plants and help them and love them, but you are not creating them, not making them. It doesn't depend on you to exist, it just wants to grow on its own. And it will. It doesn't need your anxiety either to make it happen.
When you receive the light from the sun and not from the lightbulb,-a magic trick that humans invented, a concentrated miniature spark of a god's single thought-, then you are in the flow, receiving direct love and light from the sun god.
That is true for plants too. To leave the deity in the light, you shouldn't disturb the flow of the sun. When you create labs and want to control everything to happen in your way only, you are taking out the deity from things, you taking out the meaning from things. 
These ideas were always with me and they were always with you. To bring them to the language realm is grounding them into your "wakeful" consciousness to become an every day thing in your life that continuously forms your reality.

City teaching #2: 05/28/2017 

About your purpose

What is your purpose here on earth? Who are you supposed to be? The answer is that you are supposed to be you. The real you. And that is your purpose. That is your wholeness. That is your meaning. To embrace all your thoughts and actions. To not do anything that you can not embrace. To completely and with deep love hug your traits, hug your actions and face everything out in the open. To embrace yourself.

Forest waterfall teaching #1: 05/20/2017 

About sacred archeological sites

This realm wants you to accept that notion in your consciousness that everything is un-magical. Scientists almost never ask the local people what they know about an ancient local ruin or temple, legend or beliefs. They take away from the local people what they find, put a lock on it for 100-200 years until everyone forgets what was common knowledge before, then they rediscover it, make up their own theories about it, take it away to a far away museum or name it wrong. After that they open it up for tourists and give back to the people this empty shell that nobody understands anymore. The meaning is missing from it. They describe it like it's something else, not what it is. They close off the mysteries, they take away the meaning that was known before, they erase the collective consciousness, then reshape reality in a way they want the world to happen. What can we do then? There is an option to go on journeys at these sacred places to receive the knowledge about the sacred geographical sites again. It can be helped with ayahuasca and mushroom journeys, sound, drum and gong ceremonies. That's how we receive the ancient knowledge and become seeing entities again anywhere in the world. If we are going to do these ceremonies on these sacred sites,
" the earth and the ancestors will talk to us and teach us what was held back before. We become knowledge holders about that place, the entities around it, and the knowledge of the real history that cannot exist without innate spirituality.

City teaching #3: 05/28/2017 

About influencing the dreamer

If enough people could wake up in the dream and KNOW that we are in a dream, this knowledge would embed itself into our consciousness while we are awake, or sleeping, or dead. This knowing could alter the dream. They could shape everything differently and it wouldn't matter what the dreamer would want. And wouldn't matter who is the dreamer. For us, awoke in our consciousness to realize that we are in a dream, would be enough to alter and shape this universe, these circumstances, and these rules. We could fold realities, open up gateways to anywhere and do anything that seems impossible and miraculous. We would understand our real power as the participants of this dream, that we have a power, we are not powerless in this dream, the world isn't just happening around us. At the final awakening the dreamt about wakes up so much that it becomes the dreamer and everything is realized as being one with the dreamer. That is the true magic and the meaning of life. That's where we are going toward on this infinite journey.

City teaching #4: 05/28/2017 

About lying 

Because something is a secret or is invisible, that doesn't mean you won't feel it's effects on you. If something is hidden from you, it is still influencing you.
Everything that is done in secret changes the world around you and others.
The energy of every shameful thing, every lie, every evil thought and action, low level resonance, even if it is done in secret or behind closed doors are changing the world at every second. If you lie about something and when you turn off your spiritual light to cover up something effects your path and growth.
There is a universal truth. Everything will come to the light and your higher spirit has to face it, maybe in this life or at your death. Everything will be laid out in the open for everyone to see. But the worst is not when others will see it, it will be the most painful when you have to face your own dark secrets and cover ups, deceits and pretends. Everything that you had done against others by not respecting others' integrity and others' sacred values.
Your values are sacred, you should embrace them. You should never pretend something otherwise.
For example if your values are having multiple partners, then openly have multiple partners. If your values are that you believe in monogamous relationships only, than you should live that way. When people are sneaking around to hide their values, that only means that they are not embracing themselves. The reason they are not embracing themselves is because they actually don't really know their own values or they consciously turned off their spiritual truth and want to become darkness. This causes deep suffering all the time.
Discuss your values with your partner, and try to match them. If they don't match, no matter how much you want to love that individual, it will end in suffering, repeatedly and all the time. Have continuous discussions about your values. Our values are always changing, especially when we walk on spiritual pathways. That's why it is so important to keep an open discussion about it at all times.
Lies will bring your light down, and secrets will always come out to the open. No matter what you are trying to hide, or how much you are trying to hide it. It will be visible one day for everyone to see.
All the pretended energies and actions are shaping yours and others' lives around you. You can't deceive someone without any reciprocation. We all influence each other, and if you make someone believe in a lie about yourself, invest in those ideas and open their heart for your lies; that will stain your soul more than you can imagine. And the reason is because you are not only pulling yourself down, but pulling others in the darkness, into your fears and insecurities.
Secrets have time limits. Everything will be revealed. That's the truth.

Forest home teaching #1: 06/12/2017